Consolation and desolation mean direction. Consolation is a balance between extremes. Desolation is seducing oneself to an extreme. An analogy: In the famous corridor at the Gesu Square (Rome) Jesuit Br. Pozzo applied artistic perspectivism to explain Jesuit spirituality. The corridor teems with masterful paintings and murals. Standing at either end of the corridor renders the murals and paintings warped and disproportionate. Standing, however, at the center of the corridor under a painting of the Holy Trinity renders the paintings along the corridor proportionate. From this center perspective the corridor makes sense. One can enjoy and identify with the artwork. The universe, similarly, only makes sense when we have God as the center of our lives. This worthily explains consolation and desolation.

     Another analogy: In the center of a series of concentric circles is a blazing fire. You are standing on the periphery. It is a dark room and the concentric circles are in the middle. The room is cold and you are comfortably warm standing on the periphery but you want to test the fire. Its heat and light are alluring and hypnotizing. You move closer to the fire and the circles get smaller. You do not stop though you are sweating profusely and you eventually get charred. This analogy is similar to Br. Pozzo’s explanation of Ignatian consolation and desolation. Consolation is standing comfortably heated and lighted on the periphery of the concentric circles. You do not want to move further away from the fire because you will freeze. But sometimes the fire tempts you to move closer. You do not stop in spite of getting burnt. The incandescent flames turn into charming smiles. You think the fire is your friend. It turns into your enemy the closer to it you move.

     Loneliness is like this. Lonely people are starved for someone to be with and talk to. Essentially, they are starved for emotional arousal and start feeding on themselves. They move within themselves to satisfy their need for company and they start imagining friends and talking to themselves. This delusion becomes a necessity. Convinced that no one wants to talk to them, they feed on their memories to warm up their emotions. In desolate times, however, the strongest memories are those of being belittled by oneself or by others. These memories evoke strong emotions. Although they open wounds, lonely people are so desperate for emotional arousal that they do not care about the pain. They plunge into these painful memories and they get charred. They break down and sometimes become suicidal.

     Memories are the blazing fire. Becoming mired in painful memories is getting dangerously close to the fire. On the other hand people freeze if they are unable to remember. Both warp reality. Desolation moves us to one of these two extremes. In desolation we interpret our memories in distorted and damaging ways. In consolation we remember we are loved. We remember that the strongest love we have felt is a drop in the ocean of God’s love. We warmly remember the happy times and our interpretation of our memories and life-events help us to live abundantly. In loneliness, the abyss of desolation, we revile ourselves and interpret memories and life-events in the vilest possible way. This is instinctual. The only way to overcome this instinct is by appealing to our God-instinct. The God-instinct leads us to prayer and builds up our defences. It helps us remember that we are not alone in the world. It reminds us that friends and family love us and we are worthy of this love.          

     Tips: looking back on the day’s events is indispensable. Where am I in relation to the fire? Am I getting too close to it? Am I moving too far away from it? Which thoughts must I stop myself from thinking? Which thoughts give me life and energy? When was the last time I initiated a conversation with someone?